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Leighton Meester recently talked about how motherhood has affected her career.
In an interview conducted by her husband Adam Brody for Interview Magazine, the 37-year-old Gossip Girl star spoke about how being a mother has impacted her work.
“It’s inevitable that it’s changed it, and we’ve had these conversations endlessly,” she told her husband. “I wouldn’t change anything and I’m proud of the mom I am.”
“But I also feel like I’m open to a lot of self-doubt and worry, and to more extreme hyper-vigilance and neurosis,” she continued. “So all I can do is take it a day at a time. But when I’m with the kids, our kids, I feel like all I can do is be present. Then when I’m working, I miss them like crazy.”
She added, “It’s hard not to feel as a mom that you’re not doing enough and I think that’s always going to be reinforced by our society.”
The EXmas actor admitted that being a mother shifted her whole perspective, saying: “It gave me a lot of compassion, and this whole other level of appreciation for other people and a sensitivity that I don’t think I ever had before. Particularly, when it comes to children. It’s not like a regular job. You work for 3 months, nonstop, day and night, and then not at all for the rest of time. It’s preferable.”
Meester previously broached the topic of motherhood in a separate August interview with People, talking about what it was like for her and Brody to raise their two children – daughter Arlo, 8, and an unnamed son.
“It’s all just so intimate and private,” she told the outlet. “It’s something that I could never put into words, really. It’s such an emotional journey to have children, and it certainly has made me reflect on my own upbringing and childhood.”
She continued, “Having children, I want to give them all that we never had when we were growing up, but also to be candid and open about how grateful we should be for everything that we have.”
The actor also added that she was getting into the swing of the back-to-school routine as her children grow older.
“To me, going back to school is great. My kids’ birthdays are in the summer, so that’s when they get the new clothing items that they can grow into versus all the stuff that’s getting a little bit tired on them,” she said. “It just shows that they’re growing so much.”
“We get the school supplies, maybe a new backpack. We’re definitely getting excited about going and seeing friends, the fun field trips and all the things that they’ll learn,” she gushed. “For me, I definitely try to get organized and get excited and wrap my head around the new routine — waking up early or getting ready the night before, packing lunch and packing up the backpack. We get geared up as much as possible ahead of time.”
She jokingly added, “For me growing up, the new school year was always like, ‘This is the year I’m going to be cool.’”
However, with every new milestone, Meester noted that there comes a bittersweetness. Despite the “exciting and beautiful” process of watching her children grow and become more independent, she added that it was only natural for her to be nostalgic for the days when they were just babies.